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heteroiero:

people who exercise in order to get rid of period cramps are the ones surviving the apocalypse. 

04.16.14 ♥ 358429
04.16.14 ♥ 3404

woobiesftw:

I’m confused. I thought this episode of Agents of SHIELD was gonna be 2 hours.

They played ‘Turn, Turn, Turn’ (last weeks episode) right before the new one. That’s what they meant by 2 hours.

04.16.14 ♥ 2

theweirdgirlwiththefandoms:

oh god

in the last episode skye gave the hard drive to ward because she hasn’t learned how to hold up under torture yet

and he said “we’ll get to that”

if that was some fucking twisted foreshadowing i will not be able to remain sane

04.16.14 ♥ 52

gabitzel:

This is not mine but I just had to 😂😂😂

04.16.14 ♥ 169
04.16.14 ♥ 3404
purple-platypuses:

UGH THIS KISS I AM DYING!!!

purple-platypuses:

UGH THIS KISS I AM DYING!!!

04.15.14 ♥ 130

62 Things the Avengers are Not Allowed to Do.

1. Tony is not allowed to replace the entire contents of the cafeteria with pop-tarts just because Thor has declared it the ‘food of the gods.’
2. Natasha is not allowed to interrogate new S.H.I.E.L.D. employees and dispose of the ones she deems unworthy.
3. Clint is not allowed to continue insisting that is the final step of the interview process to terrified new hires.
4. Tony is not allowed to broadcast sing-along songs into the Hulk-cage, no matter amusing he finds teaching Hulk “Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear, turn around”
5. Clint is not allowed to put the security feed of the Hulk’s Teddy Bear dance on Youtube.
6. Bruce is not allowed to hack into personnel files to look up blackmail material on Director Fury.
7. Tony is not allowed to insist that he’s already done so and that Fury’s middle name is Rainbow Sprinkles…. Because it isn’t.
8. Thor is not allowed to be naked at Headquarters. Ever.
9. Steve is not allowed to address any female S.H.I.E.L.D. agents as ‘little lady,’ ‘broad,’ or ‘dame.’ It only ends in getting slapped.
10. Agent Coulson’s name isn’t “Mom.”
11. Director Fury should never again be addressed as “Dad”
12. Agent Hill is not the Avenger’s wicked stepmother.
13. Clint is not allowed to lurk in the shadowy rafters spying on people, unless specifically instructed to do so for an official S.H.I.E.L.D. sanctioned mission.
14. ‘Operation Irritate the Fuck Out of Nick Fury’ is not an official mission, no matter what Tony or Natasha say to the contrary.
15. Debriefings should not be preceded by tequila shots.
16. Debriefings should not be followed by tequila shots.
17. There are to be no shots of any kind during debriefings.
18. Thor and Hulk will wait to fight until after the battle is over.
19. Tony Stark is not God’s gift to women.
20. The Avengers do not need matching uniforms.
21. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to have a contest to see who can make a bigger “boom” in the lab.
22. Thor is not allowed to join in and make the biggest boom with his hammer.
23. The Avengers will not be celebrating Steve’s 94th birthday.
24. The laboratory is not Tony and Bruce’s ‘Super Secret Genius Clubhouse.’ They are not allowed to bar entry to employees based on IQ test results.
25. The Avengers are not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.
26. Iron Man is not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.
27. Tony Stark is not making a promotional pin-up calendar. Or a sex tape.
28. Thor is not allowed to ‘bring down the wrath of Odinson’ on the person who ate the last package of pop-tarts.
29. Pants are not optional at team meetings.
30. ‘Pepper said it was okay’ is not a good enough reason to defy a director order from command.
31. The words “What’s the worst that could happen?” are never to be uttered on a mission ever again.
32. MC Hammer did not write Thor a theme song.
33. Gumby is not the love child of Bruce Banner and Reed Richards.
34. Natasha and Clint are not allowed to impersonate members of the clergy ever again. Ever.
35. Blasting ‘Don’t Worry, Be Happy’ at top volume into Bruce’s room on loop overnight is not an effective way to suppress the Hulk.
36. Hawkeye is not sitting in the rafters waiting to pick off people playing Galaga on their computer during work hours.
37. Tony is not allowed to bribe Natasha and Clint to physically, emotionally or psychologically torture General Ross for being ‘a great big douchebucket’ and ‘being mean to Brucie-kins.’
38. Steve is ‘Captain America’ not ‘Captain New York and those 49 other, lesser states.’
39. ‘Hulk SMASH!’ is not an effective diplomatic policy.
40. Tony is not allowed to buy the Dodgers and move them back to Brooklyn to apologize for lighting Steve’s hair on fire.
41. The phrase ‘Trust me, I’m a doctor’ never leads anywhere good.
42. It is not funny to dare Bruce to drink three quarts of green food coloring before a urine test.
43. Steve is not to be introduced as ‘Captain Tightpants’ or ‘The All-American Virgin.’
44. The Avengers do not ‘charge into battle, naked like the Celts.’ Except for The Hulk. Sometimes.
45. Natasha’s glare is not in fact fatal. Tony is not allowed to continue implying that it is.
46. Tony is not allowed to convince Bruce to help him make death ray goggles so that it will be.
47. The Avengers are not allowed to overthrow the American government, just because they didn’t like the results from the last election.
48. The Avengers are not allowed to overthrow any government, without checking in with S.H.I.E.L.D. first.
49. Clint is not allowed to sell Thor any ‘magic beans.’
50. Natasha and Clint are not allowed to try to sell Tony to another planet, even if they are promised really cool new weapons in exchange.
51. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to go to any science conferences without a chaperone.
52. A robot Tony built does not count as a chaperone.
53. Nikola Tesla is not a vampire being held in the bowels of S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters.
54. Tony and Bruce are not allowed to go searching for him in the name of Science!
55. Clint’s super-power is not ‘being super-annoying.’
56. The following words and phrases are never to be uttered over communication devices during an active mission ever again: “Exploring sexuality,” “Necrophilia,” “It’s getting hot in herr, so take off all your clothes,” “I hate everyone on this mission and I wish they’d die in a fire,” “Nick Fury can go suck on a big bag of sausages,” references to Bruce’s giant stash of weed, mention of anyone’s erection, or “Shawarma.”
57. If it makes Tony giggle for more than 30 seconds, it isn’t allowed.
58. If it makes Natasha crack a smile, it’s probably illegal.
59. Thor taking Jane to see Asgard does not count as an alien abduction. Clint should stop referring to it as such.
60. Just because Bruce agreed to work in Tony’s lab, does not mean he needs to get a “Property of Stark Industries” tattoo.
61. Tony is not allowed to design a robot to draw said tattoo on Bruce when he falls asleep in the lab.
62. Post-mission reports to Director Fury should not start out ‘So let me explain…’
04.15.14 ♥ 46423
transrants:

socialistexan:

This is what the cast of a Stonewall movie should look like, not what’s being cast.

These are just a few of the beautiful, incredible, unbelievably brave people who made our movement possible. Pay respect to the people who were involved in the Stonewall Riots by boycotting this planned whitewashed film about cis gay men and drag queens because it’s false and disrespectful to the trans women of color and the other extremely important marginalized groups that sparked the movement we have and benefit from today. Don’t allow this movie to further perpetuate the whitewashing of history and lies about who really was fighting in the Stonewall Riots.

transrants:

socialistexan:

This is what the cast of a Stonewall movie should look like, not what’s being cast.

These are just a few of the beautiful, incredible, unbelievably brave people who made our movement possible. Pay respect to the people who were involved in the Stonewall Riots by boycotting this planned whitewashed film about cis gay men and drag queens because it’s false and disrespectful to the trans women of color and the other extremely important marginalized groups that sparked the movement we have and benefit from today. Don’t allow this movie to further perpetuate the whitewashing of history and lies about who really was fighting in the Stonewall Riots.

04.15.14 ♥ 3762

killyspinacoladas:

youreagoodliar:

This will forever be my favorite piece of Captain America trivia.

There’s an interview somewhere that I cannot find for the life of me with Chris Evans and Hayley Atwell and she mentions being so in awe that she had to touch him. The interviewer asked Chris about it (they were separate interviews on the same video) and he was like “Yeah, she gave me an impromptu boob squeeze”. LMAO

04.15.14 ♥ 2313

regionsofkindness:

Let’s talk about happy Melinda May + Fitzsimmons moments:

Let’s talk about how much potential Melinda May saw in them, enough for her to trust them with her best friend’s body and mind.

Let’s talk about Melinda May taking them into the field for the first time, gently teasing Fitz about getting…

04.14.14 ♥ 164

hooklesslyinlove:

applefreakx:

Maybe one day theyll even invite you to dinner.”

Jfc, that was uncalled for

04.14.14 ♥ 2440
cancer-of-themind:

;
04.11.14 ♥ 56135

"I have a feeling that your happy ending is right around the corner"

04.11.14 ♥ 208